"But he himself went a day's journey into the wilderness, and came and sat down under a juniper tree: and he requested for himself that he might die; and said, It is enough; now, O LORD, take away my life; for I am not better than my fathers." (I Kings 19:4)
I hate Satan. Probably shouldn't have to say that, but man what a ruthless, heartless brutal enemy he is! Some of you might now I wrote a book a few years ago about pastoral burnout. I have definitely experienced that since then!
Why is it we tend to separate ourselves from each other - especially when we need each other the most? I have always been a loner. Since childhood that has been my life. Raised (basically) an only child - my sister was fourteen years older than me, and I had no other siblings - not allowed to have friends, not allowed to date when I got old enough, kept on a short leash by an overbearing mother. And yet, others have told me how they thought of me as a John Wayne-type, a Lone Wolf out on the ridge, a drifter who WANTED that life. Crazy. Then as an adult it seems those who should have the most in common, who should enjoy being around each other - don't. We find excuses to segregate or shut out each other. Race, religion, ethnicity, color, language, sex, whatever - any excuse to pare down the crowd to the smallest common denominator.
That's where I am today. Twirling at the end of a frayed rope that looks like it could break at any moment, dangling over a thousand-foot gorge, and my hands are getting tired. I'm sure you have felt the same way before. Today standing before a firing squad or tied to a stake over a fire seems like an upgrade. Wow! I never thought those words would come out of my mouth, but there they are. And where did those thoughts come from? My enemy. He whispered those thoughts into my head when I wasn't paying attention.
So. What now? Do I simply let go of the rope and tumble into the abyss? Do I give up and wait for the end? NO! As Paul wrote, "God forbid!" Now that I have hit the end, I can look back up. I can be thankful. Thankful for the rope, first of all! Thankful I was given the opportunity to see what I now see. Thankful the rope is tied on the top end to something (more like Someone) Who won't let go and won't leave me hanging. No matter where I find myself, I know Jesus is always there - always within earshot of my cry, always looking over me and protecting me. With each spoken word of gratitude, I slowly gain strength to hang on as Jesus draws me back. Back to where I was before I lost my footing. Thankfulness. That's the key! I will enter His gates with thanksgiving in my heart! From there, I will gain access to His courts with praise! Hallelujah!
Maybe you are hanging one rope over, my friend. Perhaps you feel as I did just a few minutes ago - hopeless, weak, dizzy, lonely. Look up, my friend. Redemption draws nigh. Jesus knows all about my troubles. He will guide til the day is done. There's not a friend like the lowly Jesus. No not one. No. Not. One. Look up, speak up, lift up your head to the One Who comes in our times of despair. Cry out to Jesus like Peter did on the water. Be rescued. Be saved.
Be blessed.
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